Who Will be Attending Your Event?
How Many People Will be Attending?
How Interested Will My Guests be in the Event?
I receive more than 250 requests a year asking me to publicize various events, and the number increases every year. Many people on my list look to me to screen parties and events for them. Given that I can publicize about 20 percent of these, I've developed very specific criteria.
If you would like me to publicize your event, please read this page, information to include in an invitation, and how to setup an Evite invitation very carefully, before you send me your proposed Evite. As noted on the other two pages, I ask that you send me a specific phrase that indicates you've read these three pages. If you don't, I will simply ask that you read these pages again. It's much simpler if people simply follow these guidelines the first time. I do this for free. These guidelines are designed (i) to ensure that my guests receive all of the information they need and (ii) to minimize the amount of time I spend publicizing other people's events.
I have some very precise guidelines that must be followed if you want me to publicize your event. What happens all too frequently is that people wait until the last minute, they create an Evite, and they don't follow these guidelines. I then ask them to redo the invitation; sometimes we go through several passes because they simply don't read and follow these guidelines. In the meantime, every day passes and the event is becoming closer and closer. In some case, by the time the event happens, they still haven't gotten it right. They want me to send it out, which I won't do, because I don't want to pester my guests with an invitation that is not up to our standards (e.g., not all of the necessary information is there, or there is insufficient contrast between the foreground and the background or not all of the necessary information is there). So in many cases, the invitation is never sent out and in the meantime, they've spent considerable time designing a worthless Evite.
All of this is dumb, dumb, dumb and is easily avoided. Read these guidelines carefully and create your Evite at least 10 days (or even a few weeks) before you want me to send it out. If you end up having technical problems or somehow don't understand my guidelines, you'll have time to remedy any problems. Don't wait until the last minute — I frankly don't work well under pressure. I will be saying to myself, "You knew you were hosting this event months ago. Why are you contacting me at the last minute?"
Events can be divided into two categories: (i) those where you're primarily interested in the event itself and (ii) those where you are primarily interested in who is attending. If you're going to the BSO, presumably your primary interest is the music rather than talking with the people attending before or after the concert. If you're attending a party, then presumably the people you're going to talk with are of more interest than the venue or the event.
If your event is a party (or an event where people are often coming primarily based on who is attending, such as art gallery openings), then I want to make certain that the people who will be attending are the kind of people my guests are interested in meeting. My parties have been so successful because I have tapped into an unmet need for "high level" interesting people to meet others who are equally interesting. More than any other social group in Boston, my invitation list consists of a more CEOs of companies, entrepreneurs, venture capitalists and LBO professionals, tenured faculty at major universities, physicians at the major teaching hospitals, published authors, talented musicians and authors, Rhodes Scholars, and McArthur fellows. My guests do not hang out at Whiskey Park on Saturday evening. There are lots of social groups in Boston where one can meet the "bridge and tunnel" crowd. My guests gravitate to my parties because I offer a very different experience than most of the parties in Boston.
The kind of events that attract the kind of people my guests would want to meet, and therefore the kind of events I will publicize, include the parties and galas sponsored by the Boston Public Library Young Professionals, the Friends of the Public Garden, the American Ireland Fund, the Boston Anthenauem, the MFA Council (which is very different from First Fridays), the Gardner Museum, the Neighborhood Association of Back Bay, the Bastille Day party hosted by the French Library, and the Councils Ball given by the United Nations Association of Greater Boston. Other examples would include the Winter Ball and Biotech Tuesdays.
For events I do not host, the first question I will ask you is, "What kind of people are going to be there?" If I have doubts, I will not take the risk. When I send out an announcement, there is an implicit "James Mitchell Seal of Approval." I've developed a good reputation for selecting appropriate events and I don't want my guests to attend a party they might not enjoy. Since I'm already sending them so many other invitations, I would rather err on the side of not sending a particular invitation.
Some very crude measures might include:
More than anything, I am concerned with the social skills of those attending events that I publicize. If many of the people attending are not friendly, if they cannot easily meet strangers and carry on a conversation, if there are lots of little cliques which are unwelcoming to newcomers, the chances that my guests will have a good time are low.
I don't mean to criticize groups of people who attend these other kinds of parties. It's just that there are lots of parties and events in Boston where one can meet, for example, people who smoke. I'm offering a niche product that is quite different from most of the other social groups in town, and it is this differentiation that has made these parties so successful.
There is a minimum level of attendance at an event to create energy and excitement, and I will try to ascertain if enough people will be attending. Art gallery openings in Back Bay, for example, rarely attract enough people to make their parties a success. So what assurances can you offer me that a significant number of people will attend?
A key factor for me will be how interested will my guests be in the event? If I publicize your event, I will be sending an Evite to a few thousand people, each of whom will spend several seconds to a few minutes reading this invitation. I don't want to incur this collective cost of time spent unless a reasonable number of people will actually attend. A significant number of people on my list have said, for example, that they would like to hear about golf events. So far, I have sent Evites for four separate golf events, and in each case, the response has been terrilbe — the most popular of the four had three people sign up. So it's unlikely I will publicize golf events in the future.
1. Have they sent me an Evite that I can send out with no editing? A lot of people send me Evites that are completely unusable — they're not written in an invitation format, it's not obvious what the event is, or it doesn't include all of the information my guests need to know. I've developed a list of what to include in an invitation. If I have to edit your invitation, it's not likely I will send it out.
2. Location — People on my list are primarily interested in events in Back Bay, Beacon Hill and Harvard Square. The South End, the financial district and Brookline are also acceptable but are not as desirable as the first three locales. For other locations, it is much less likely I'll send an invitation. For an event on Nantucket, for example, how many people on my list are realistically going to go to it?
3. Can the event be easily found, based on my own experience? I've never been able to find any location in South Boston, Charlestown or Somerville (my GPS system does not seem to work in South Boston), so it is unlikely I would ever send out such an invitation. The few times I have done so, the next day I have received several e-mails from people saying they drove around for 30 minutes trying to find the event and they couldn't. I do not want to receive those kind of e-mails in the future.
4. Venue is important. I used to give my large cocktail parties at 33 restaurant, and I've been amazed at how much attendance has increased simply because I now give them at the Ritz-Carlton and the Harvard Club of Boston. People on my list care about venue. Venues such as the Ritz, the Four Seasons, the Langham Hotel, the Boston Harbor Hotel, the Lenox Hotel, Davio's, the Armani Cafe, and the Harvard Club are desirable. If it's being held at Felt or Whiskey Park, it's unlikely that very many of my guests would be interested in attending.
5. For cultural events, I have a preference for "highbrow" cultural events. If it's opera, classical music or theatre, I'm likely to send it out. If it's country music, it had better be Johnny Cash. If it's bowling or mud wrestling, I'm not going to send it.
6. My cultural tastes are somewhat conservative. If it's too out-of-the-box, I'm probably not interested. I'm a little bit more flexible about art than I am for live performances, because if my guests don't like the art, they can simply ignore it and talk with the people who are attending.
7. Will people be able to talk? This is a function of venue and the setup. At Saint, for example, they usually play fairly loud music in the background, which makes it difficult to talk, so I'm less likely to send an Evite for an event held there than at a quieter place. (I do sometimes send out such invitations, since Saint is such a popular place to host functions at.) At some black tie charity events, they have a band and no separate room, making it basically impossible for people to talk because of the band. If I know that's going to be the case, I'm not going to send an invitation — I don't want my guests paying $125 for a party they probably will not enjoy.
8. I prefer parties where there are not talks or speeches — introductions by the host, thanking the people who helped make the event happen, speeches by the guest of honor. My guests go to parties to talk with other people, not to hear speeches. If there will be any talks or speeches, I'm going to be very skeptical. I might send out an announcement if I can be assured that such talks in entirety will last no more than 5 minutes. This obviously does not apply when the primary purpose of the event is to give a talk or speech.
9. Many of the requests I receive are for guest-of-honor dinners — the purpose of the event or dinner is to honor Joe Blow, who has done more for humanity than Mother Teresa. In every case Joe (or Jane) Blow has been a great guy (or gal), but unless I can be assured that Mr. (or Ms.) Blow and everyone else combined will not talk for more than 5 minutes combined, I will not publicize the event.
10. I do not as a matter of policy send out invitations to events that have a live auction. My guests go to parties to talk with other people; they are not interested in hearing an auctioneer rattle on, selling items. To repeat — if there is even five minutes of a live auction, my list is not appropriate. Silent auctions are always fine, as my guests love silent auctions.
11. It's acceptable if there is an announcement of who won a raffle, or who ended up purchasing items at a silent auction, as long as the total time spent on this is 5 minutes or less, including any other talks or speeches.
12. Does the event have a track record, and if so, what is it? First choice would be an annual/periodic event that did a great job last time. Second choice would be an event with no track record. Last choice would be an event that did a lousy job last time. In that case, I'll probably say, "Let's pass on sending an invitation this year, see how they do, and if they do it right, then I'll send it out next year."
13. Is the event too commercial for my list? Most of the invitations I send out are for non-profit and charitable organizations. I also do send invitations to events held by for-profit firms, such as the Ralph Lauren parties, but the event cannot be too commercial. One stock broker asked me to invite people to a seminar on investing. I wouldn't do that unless it was solely educational.
I am certainly open to publicizing events hosted by for-profit firms, as long as the event is appropriate for my invitation list.
15. Book signings are fine, as long as I think the author would be of interest to enough people on my list, and I believe that enough people will be attending. At a book signing I have no problem if the author talks.
17. Do I expect to attend the event?
If after reading this, you feel your event is appropriate for my list, send me an e-mail. If I agree, I will ask you to setup an Evite invitation. When you setup an Evite invitation, please include all necessary information. Once you have set it up, you should transfer the invitation to me (which Evite calls "changing the organizer"), and I'll then send the Evite invitation to my list.
On my invitation list, I have a lot of people who say they will come and then don't. Expect at least 50 percent of those who say "Yes" not to show. As for Maybes, almost none of them will attend.
Cost is a significant factor in how many people will attend. Many of those who are on my invitation list have limited incomes — they are students, they are underemployed, they work for non-profit organizations, they are trying to start a business. One of the reason my parties are so successful is that they are free.
On the other hand, I do have a significant number of individuals on my list who have a substantial amount of money — managing partners of $1+ billion equity funds, successful entrepreneurs, senior executives of companies. Even for these individuals, I have found that the price point of the event makes a substantial difference in attendance. Perhaps it's the famed Yankee frugality.
Here's an example. In May, 2004, the United Nations Association of Greater Boston hosted its Consuls Ball, with tickets costing $175. Because I am on the committee, I took an active interest in increasing attendance, and this was one of the few events that I did not sponsor myself yet I sent out follow-ups to those who did not respond — as many as a dozen follow-ups. Yet I was barely able to sell two tables, and many of those were sold within two days of the party.
In May, 2005, the same party will cost $250. Even though I now have a a substantially larger invitation list, at most I expect to sell one table, simply because of the increase in price.
Bottom line, if your event is expensive, it's unlikely I will sell a lot of tickets for you. On the other hand, I'm not opposed to sending out Evites for such events, particularly since my invitees can opt out of receiving invitations for expensive events.
Of the 250+ requests I receive each year to publicize parties and events, more than one-half are for charitable events. In many cases, people ask that an exception be made because "it's such a worthy cause." I know this sounds callous, but how worthwhile the cause is has no effect on whether I publicize the event. The reason is that as far I can tell, every charitable event that I am asked to publicize is for a worthwhile cause — to date, no one has asked me to publicize events to raise money for Nazis, hate groups, or terrorists. The people in my list sign up because they like going to parties. If they attend an charitable event, in most cases the primary reason that they are attending is because they think the party will be a good one, rather than how worthwhile the cause is. If the party does not meet my criteria, I'm not going to publicize it. If you want me to publicize it in the future, then make the changes I believe are desirable to have a great party &mash; good location, great venue, no loud music, not too crowded, no talks lasting more than 5 minutes, no live action, etc.
Some charities have asked that I forward fund raising solicitations to my list. Unfortunately, I can't do that. People sign up for my list because they want to go to parties. Some have commented that I currently send out too many e-mails. Unless it is an actual event that meets the criteria listed on this page, realistically I can't send out an e-mail.
Political fund raisers are out of the question. People on my list run the political gamut from libertarians to economic conservatives to middle of the roaders to liberals to far left Cambridge radicals. A fund raiser for any political person, party or cause would simply alienate too many people on my list.
I will send out announcements for political discussions and seminars, provided that their primary purpose is educational rather than fund raising. Discussions, seminars and conferences on political/social issues are fine as long as they are reasonably balanced and not too partisan. A conference on global warming that presented all viewpoints would be fine, while a rally to protest against oil companies would not be.
I will also consider events where a major political figure is speaking if attending it does not imply too much of an endorsement of that individual. If you attend a political fund raiser for Governor Mitt Romney, that implies you approve of what he is doing. If there was an event where Governor Romney was speaking (such as at the Kennedy School) and there was an opportunity to meet with him and learn more about him, I would send the invitation. (After all, whatever you think of him, he is Governor of our state, through 2006.) A rally in favor of or opposition to the same sex marriage decision issued by the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court would not be acceptable, but a conference analyzing that decision — with different viewpoints — would be acceptable.
I'll also send out announcements for controversial figures who are speaking, again as long as the primary purpose of the talk is educational. If Noam Chomsky was explaining his foreign policy views, that would be acceptable. If he was leading a protest march, that would not be acceptable. In selecting such individuals, it makes absolutely no difference to me whether I agree with their views. Rather, it's whether I think they are a thoughtful individual.
One factor I'll look at is who is hosting the event. If it's a political party or an organization with a political agenda, then I probably won't send it out. If it's an organization that is supposedly objective — a university, the National League of Women Voters, or something like that — then I would be much more likely to send it out.
Bottom line — Ask yourself is the event primarily educational or political? If the former, I'm likely to send it out. If the latter, it's not appropriate for my list.
For my large cocktail parties and some of the other events I host, I send follow-ups to those who have not yet RSVPed. My doing so is the only reason why I am able to gather 500 people every month for the large cocktail parties. Except in very unusual circumstances (e.g., I am on the Board of Directors of the organization), I do not do this for events I do not host, so please do not ask me. People already tell me they receive too many Evites from me. If I sent follow-ups for every event I publicize, people would receive several e-mails a day from me, and this would annoy them. I am willing to send one reminder to those who have said Yes, Maybe at have viewed but not responded to the invitation, but I am not willing to send reminders to those who have said No or who have not responded. When you set up the Evite invitation, you can choose how many days (between 2 and 7 days) before the event the reminder is sent.
Most of the people on my do not RSVP events I do not host. Depending on how much notice is given, between 5 and 15 will typically respond to an invitation that is sent only once.
Use your good judgment to ascertain when I will make an exception to these guidelines — i.e., if the primary purpose of the party or event is contrary to one of these guidelines, I may publicize it if it is clear what my guests are signing up for.
You get the idea. Use your good judgment.
It is your decision when I send out the Evite invitation (once I have approved it), not mine. I will send it out any day you want, as long as you understand I will only send it once. (My invitees would strangle me if I send follow-ups for every event I publicize. I am willing to send one reminder to those who have said Yes, Maybe or have viewed the invitation but have not responded.) I can send it out 3 months before the event, the day of the event, or whenever you choose. In general, I find that most hosts/organizers wait until the last minute, they take some time to get their Evite approved, and the invitation is sent too late.
How much notice do I recommend you provide? (You're free to ignore my suggestions.) You want to give people sufficient notice but not too much notice — e.g., if you tell them about an informal cocktail party 6 months ahead of time, that is silly and unproductive. The more formal and more expensive the event, the more notice you should give. If you're hosting a black tie charity event that costs $150 to attend, I would recommend at least 2 months notice; 3 months would be ideal. If you're hosting an event that is inexpensive and less formal, 2 to 3 weeks notice is probably ideal. It's your choice, however, and I'll go with whatever date you want. You simply need to tell me when to send it out. I have a very good tickler system, which I check every day, so when you tell me, I'll put that in my tickler system.
As noted above, I am willing to send out a reminder to those who have said Yes or Maybe and to those who have viewed the invitation but have not yet responded. Evite gives you a choice of choosing between 2 and 7 days (or to send no reminders). Whatever number of days you choose is what it will be, as Evite does this automatically. I will not even look at your choice so make certain you choose the number of days you want. Evite's default is 2 days.
Don't have more than one person contact me. Sometimes Sally says that Jill is working on the invitation, and Jill has consulted with Tom, who contacts me, but it really is Peter who is running things, but Peter is away and thus Lauren is temporarily in charge, except on Sundays, when no one is in charge. I get easily confused and I quickly lose interest. I start with the assumption that every Evite I send out for another group should involve one interaction with me, rather than a series of interactions over a 10-day period. Pick one person for me to deal with, who is computer savvy, who can make decisions, and who will doing the work. That person should be easy to reach by telephone and should not be going on vacation (or a long trip) the next day.
Some of the people who ask me to publicize their events are computer challenged. Even though I believe the instructions I've written are clear, many are just not able to figure out, e.g., how to create an Evite invitation and to transfer the organizer to me. Whoever you choose to interface with me, that person should have decent computer skills. If the person I end up dealing with is a computer novice, I'm simply going to ask that someone else start the process from scratch, which will obviously slow things down.
To repeat — Please assign a computer-savvy person to create an Evite invitation and to interface with me. If you're hosting your event solo and you're a computer novice, or no one on your committee knows much about computers, it would be best if you asked a friend of yours who does know a lot about computers to read these instructions and to help you create the Evite invitation.
When you person contact me, please include in every e-mail you send me:
In addition, the first time you contact me, you should include the specific phrase I mention in the other two Web pages to indicate that you've read these guidelines.
If after reading this you would like me to publicize your event, please carefully read:
Those two pages contain instructions on what to include in an invitation and how to setup an Evite invitation. After you have finished your Evite invitation and before you send it to me, please print out those other two pages. Read each paragraph and bulleted item carefully, make certain you have followed each item (or there is an appropriate exception), and then check it off. Many of the Evites I receive don't come close to following these guidelines. In those cases, I ask them to read these guidelines again, which just slows down the process. It would make a lot more sense if people just read and followed them the first time.
At the end of How to Setup an Evite Invitation I have included some phrasing for people to write back to me to indicate that they have read and followed these guidelines. If I don't receive that phrasing, I will assume people have not read these guidelines very carefully and I will simply ask them to read them again. In the meantime, the invitations are not being sent. It simply makes much more sense to follow these guidelines the first time.